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Practical Ways to Use The Empathy Exercise [With Examples]

So here we are at part 3 of this mini-series where I will share with you practical ways you can use The Empathy Exercise in order to stand out and attract those clients. 

And this is where it gets fun! I love this, it’s so exciting to me!

So take a look at how I take one aspect of The Empathy Exercise and turn it into copy for your website, directory, blog and social media. 


A quick recap

This is the 3rd part of a 3 part mini-series called How To Attract Your Dream Clients.

Part 1: Build Your Dream Practice looks at how the first and most important thing to consider when you want to attract dream clients and that is YOU - what is your dream? what do YOU want? What drives you? Where does your passion lie? 

Part 2: The Empathy Exercise: How to Read your Dream Clients Mind introduces you to the empathy exercise, a deceptively exercise I devised in order to read the minds of your dream clients and work out how they feel, what are their fears and worries? What keeps them up at night? And what their hopes and dreams are - what are they aiming for?

So here we are at part 3 and I'll share with you practical ways to use The Empathy Exercise in order to stand out and attract those clients. 

And this is where it gets fun!

I love this, it’s so exciting to me! This is one of the reasons I love my membership so much! Every week in the Monday Motivation live call, members get a social media post that they can copy, tweak and paste. And I especially love helping people to use blogging as a powerful way to attract clients

So if you need some help, check out the Grow Your Private Practice membership because I’d love to help you too. 

Using the Empathy Exercise to Attract Clients

In part 2 I used the example of your dream client going out for lunch and we talked this through. 

We looked at the occasion in depth, things like:

  • Who suggested the meeting
  • How they felt beforehand 
  • How did the conversation pan out
  • How did they choose what to eat
  • Who paid the bill

So in this example, I did the empathy exercise and came up with these ideas: 

  • Felt excited about meeting their friend
  • Their friend had invited her, because she rarely takes the lead 
  • Why? She worries people will say no, worries she is too boring, too much.
  • She feels uncomfortable because she’s not sure what to wear
  • Arrives early - always arrives early, doesn't want people to have to wait for her
  • Met inside the cafe - felt very worried about walking in alone
  • Her friend did most of the talking, which she was relieved about 
  • ...But also felt unimportant as friend didn't show any interest in her
  • She wanted to choose burger and chips but her friend choose soup, so she did the same
  • When the bill came, she insisted on paying it, despite her finances being stretched. 

How to you use these details in your marketing

The first thing to do is consider why they behaved in this way. You might not know exactly, but use your empathy and put yourself in their shoes. 

  • She felt excited about meeting her friend because she’s been feeling lonely
  • She rarely asks people to meet up because she is afraid of rejection , and deep down she doesn't think they really like her. She worries she has nothing exciting to add to the conversation
  • She doesn't know what to wear - maybe she doesn't have much money so hasn't been able to buy new things, 
  • Maybe she puts her needs last all the time, so does without. 

Can you see how you are really getting into their head now?

So just from exploring how she feels about going for lunch with a friend, you have discovered that she has a low self-esteem, puts her needs last, feels lonely and worries that she doesn't fit in.

Practical ways to use The Empathy Exercise

Your website home page

I suggest starting with 3 pain points i.e. what they are struggling with.


  • Do you feel a bit lonely, and worry that you don’t fit in?
  • Maybe you always put the needs of others first, and your own needs last?
  • Or maybe you want to make new friends but worry they will find you boring?

I also recommend having 3 'ideal outcomes' ie what they want from counselling. 


  • Do you wish you had a full social life, where you feel valued by friends that are happy to see you?

So already from that one situation of going for lunch with a friend, it has helped you write copy for your website that your ideal clients will resonate with. 

This is how powerful The Empathy Exercise is!

Your directory entry

This can say the same as your home page, which demonstrates that you really understand them. 

NOTE what not to say: If you say you're a person centred or humanistic counsellor that offers a safe space - change it up, because that wont make you stand out.

Use this and you WILL stand out to the exact people that you want to attract. Cool, right?

Write blog posts

Use the information you've learned in The Empathy Exercise as a base for blog posts.


  • 7 ways to overcome loneliness
  • Scared of being rejected - try this
  • Are you giving too much? Here’s how to find the balance
  • How to tell if you’re being used (and what to do about it)
  • How therapy helps raise your self esteem

Those first 4 are blogs that I have already written from when I have a business about self care for people pleasers You can check them out at Self Care for People Pleasers for some inspiration. 

Or write a blog about ‘what happens in the first session’ to put their mind at rest.

Write social media posts

Use the information from The Empathy Exercise to come up with numerous social media posts


  • Sharing a simple tip, like:

>Increase confidence before a meeting using like tapping (EFT) 

>…or a meditation. 

>…Or listen to uplifting music. 

  • Or to not always be the first to pick up the bill by sitting on your hands 

Example: ‘Do you find you’re always first to offer the pay the bill, and that some people always let you? I read a great tip - just sit on your hands when the bill comes. Literally. Try it, and tell me how it goes

Tell a story about something you’ve done, like

  • The time you felt shy but did the thing anyway and nothing bad happened - reference the book ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’
  • The time you went to a meeting for the first time and almost didnt go - but you ended up making friends. Dont make your stories up, but you’ll probably have something to share with a little thought
  • Share an affirmation, like

I am at peace with myself.

I am a valuable human being.

I appreciate who I am.

I value myself as a person.

My future is bright.

I deserve to relax.

I deserve to be happy.

  • Recommend a podcast or book to help with building confidence, or something that came out of the exercise. 

And when recommending a book, talk about why you are recommending it - what do you particularly like. Is there a quote you can take from the book?

Offer a thought for reflection

Something the reader can either just ponder, or journal about


'What would happen if I didn't pay the bill?’

A quote, like ‘if you wouldn't say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself’

If you wouldnt say it to a friend, don't say it to yourself

Or ‘The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have’

The relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have

And remember, these all post ideas came from just one small everyday event. 

Imagine how much inspiration you’d have if you did The Empathy Exercise for many different situations? You’d never run out of ideas! 

Action step

Inspiration without action is merely inspiration, so it’s time to take action.

Look at what came up from The Empathy Exercise and use my suggestions to think of further ideas. 

So if you've followed this mini-series, you now have a business you love working with the people and issues that interest you. Not only that, you are working in the way that feels right for you.

And you’ll attract your dream clients and help them get the transformations they want in order to improve their lives. 

But not only that - you’ll enjoy your marketing because you’re working with your passion, and because you love it, you’ll naturally get better at it making the whole process easier and more enjoyable.

Which leads to more clients, more satisfaction and, of course, more money.

So I do hope you’ve enjoyed this mini-series, and I'd love to know how you get on with it.

Drop me a message - On LinkedIn or Instagram. I look forward to hearing from you. 

Thank you so much for reading, and if you're a therapist looking to take your practice to the next level, consider joining the membership community. 

As a member, you'll gain access to exclusive courses, training, workshops and guest expert masterminds as well as resources, tools, and importantly support from fellow therapists. 

Hop on over and visit my the Grow Your Private Practice website to learn more and sign up today. Together, let's grow your private practice and achieve your goals.

Join the Grow Your Private Practice Club, and learn how to attract more clients, more easily

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Jane lives in beautiful Lincoln with her 2 boys and rescue dog. When she's not talking about herself in the third person, she's usually found with her feet up and eating Maltesers. Sometimes she even shares them with friends.